The Great British Bake off is back! I love that show, it is comforting and perfect viewing for all ages. There is something very relaxing about watching contestants freak out over a sponge cake or an over-whipped buttercream. After protesting she didn’t ‘watch that rubbish‘ , grandma reluctantly agreed to watch an episode with me when I came to live with her and was completely hooked. I don’t have many non-negotiables, but being able to watch Bake Off is one.

Grandma now enthusiastically watches every episode, and picks her favourite contestants that she champions throughout the series. She even keeps her grumbling over the silly humour to a minimum. She is also a very harsh judge, if you think Paul Hollywood is intimidating, he’s a puppy compared to Joan Barnes who is ruthless with her not-at-all-professional opinions. They both have blue eyes too. She will drop her favourites in an instant over a sub-par bake with a cold: ‘What a shame, they were good.’ Despite the contestant not yet being eliminated (or dead).

Watching Bake Off has inspired grandma to get me to bake more so she can practise her tough judging skills on a real life victim. If there is a bake she likes, she will lift her head – grandma code for: ‘I’m about to give you an order.‘ and loudly say: ‘I think we’ll have that this weekend.’ Grandma code for: ‘Make that this weekend so I can judge it and you.’

I’m a decent (if slightly traumatised) baker and I enjoy it, so I dutifully bake what she requests and nervously wait for her feedback. The verdict is usually that my attempt tastes good but it could look better, which is doubly harsh as she is nearly blind, and that it could do with more booze in it. She does have her favourites that I make regularly for her, she loves a whisky chocolate mousse that I make, and requests the bowl and spatula to lick when the mousses are in the fridge setting – you don’t see that on the show. I’m delighted she likes it, and add an extra splash of booze in her portion.

I’m never far away from her honest opinions of my baking attempts though:

‘I think I could do that. Bet it would taste good.‘ I said as we watched the first episode of the most recent series.

‘It wouldn’t look as good though.‘ Was her reply

‘Thanks…so I shouldn’t apply for the next series then?‘ I asked, amused.

‘No, I don’t think so.‘

I would need to dramatically up my baking game to apply, the judging would be a breeze though.